Who Am I Now? Reflective Education Essay

My name is Muhammad Razin bin Amir Hamzah and I used to be called as Razin. I am 21 years old. Currently, I am furthering my study in Bachelor of Science in Computing under University of Wales, United Kingdom. Now, I am in the second year. There is only one year to go for me to complete my study. I enrolled in this course to fulfill my aspiration towards becoming the next Steve Job, the Chief Executive Officer of Apple Incorporation.

It took 21 years to create where I am today. Within these years I worked hard to get where I am right now. The best way to know where am I now is by looking into my strengths and weaknesses. I have analysed, evaluated, and looked deep inside myself to determine the weaknesses and strengths of my true character. Positive attitude and patience are the two important strengths that I have built in me. These two characteristics have contributes to my career, my learning and almost everything in my personal life. On the other hand, the two aspects of myself that I need to improve are my organization skills and my public speaking skills.

Having positive attitude is vital. This leads to a motivated learning team, a comfortable working environment, and a happy personal life. It is hard to find a scenario in which a person with positive attitude and full of compliments to be scolded. No negative or bad attitudes make my personal life great. I socialized with my family with happy and respectful thoughts which motivate them to share their happiness with me and others. My attitude keeps people around me in a good mood. This personal characteristic of mine allows me to manage the tense situations during my study sessions, especially when I have to answer assignment questions and submit them before the due date. Being positively motivated, I encourage others to be compliant and respectful. Positive attitude will be beneficial in my learning team because it will promote teamwork and friendship. I think a happy and friendly team will be more productive than a team that always argues and disagrees.

My second strength is patience. We will feel comfortable when we speak to someone who is patient. People with patience do not interrupt others, instead they listen and try to be helpful. In my personal life, I have an autistic nephew who needs people with a lot of patience. Being bossy, angry, and snappy will only make me hard to handle him. I have to talk slowly and repeat my words several times so that he will understand me. In my study environment, it is also imperative that I have patience. I have to deal with tough and difficult assignment questions. Each question has its own degree of difficulties. Thus, I need to conquer each of the questions with my best answer and support it with reasonable evidence. I have to patiently search for the articles on the respective topics and provide my best answer to ensure that I get good results in my study. In addition, patience is a must when participating in a team environment. When many people get together in a team, things often progress very fast. However, sometimes things get sloppy or get misunderstood. With patience, I can maintain consistency and accurateness within an organization.

Having described my strengths, I must now turn to reveal my weaknesses. I must say that I am not a superhuman or a perfect person. My weaknesses often frustrate and challenge me, but my positive attitude forces me to correct my weaknesses and win over them. My first weakness, I must admit, is public speaking. I get very nervous. The sign is my hands get clammy and begins to sweat. Droplets of water appear on my face and I mumble my words when I start to speak in front of large group of people. This problem neither gives a huge impact in my personal life nor affects my on-line learning team, but it does affect my daily duties at college. I speak with others in college, especially with my friends, regarding general knowledge and current issues. I am told that my nervousness does not show, but before and during every speech I feel my hands shake, my feet get clammy, and my face starts to sweat. Over the years, I have fought this battle of public speaking by doing many things. First, I have completed a college level English class. Second, I completed a college level speech class. Recently, I took an English tuition class to enhance my communication skill and widen my English vocabulary.

My second blind spot that I must admit is my lack of organization skill. I organize my assignment papers by tossing them on my study desk. Thus, I will avoid looking at them. It is hard for me to find my belongings especially in my study room because of my unorganized attitudes. When the assignment season arrives, it will be a disaster for me. I often lose my important notes and my framework papers. These matters has made me spend twice the actual time needed to accomplish my task. I lose valuable times for this reason, whereas I could have used those precious times together with my family. Besides that, this will seriously affect my learning team. Before it gets much more severe, I have to improve my deportment and be a better organised person. I will not frighten up myself when I see papers containing college assignments. What I need to help me overcome my problem are a desk together with filing cabinets and a day planner calendar. The fears of obtaining a bad result in my diploma level made me realize that organization skill is crucial to succeed in life, especially in my study.

WHAT DO I WANT TO ACCOMPLISH?

My short term goal is to finish my undergraduate program with a first class honours. In other words, I want to complete my study with flying colours. This is because the only commitment that I have now is being a full time student. So, my part is just to concentrate on my studies and struggle hard to achieve my ambition towards becoming the Information Technology lecturer. By building up a good academic base, I can hunt the job I wanted very fast without any resistance. Besides, by achieving good results, I will be exempted from paying back Perbadanan Tabung Pendidikan Tinggi Nasional (PTPTN) loan. This will surely reduce my family burden to settle off my carried loan.

My long term goal is that I will be counted among successful lecturer. I do often ask myself, what a better job would be than to be a lecturer. The answer is none. I believe that the ability to change and improve the world to be a better place for people to live starts from the effort and idea given by the educator. So, it will be my huge contribution to the society. I set high objectives for me as an educator and put a very great effort to accomplish my goals.

I began to realize that awesome teachers have their own distinctive skills which I need to learn. Following their examples can make me become someone in the society. To be good at elucidating the contents of a subject, to be firm and patient towards students, to be always fair to students, to set high and realistic expectations, to have the skills to advice and motivate others are some of the indicators that are needed to become a great teacher.

A great teacher will explain questions asked by their students and make them fully understand, and not let their students walk away in doubt. Brainstorming will be the best tool used by extraordinary teachers to convey particular lesson plan if their student did not understand. He or she would think, “How am I going to explain this particular concept to my student and they need to understand clearly what I am teaching?” This is the type of teacher I intend to be. Ability to inspire others is not just a gift or an opportunity but it’s a challenge. Currently, we can see that there are thousands of educators still with their old mind-set and do not like to accept this challenge. This serious matter need to be changed. Nowadays, students are being forced to school. Most of the time, students will think that learning is not their main priority but teaching is a teacher’s job. Students always learn but they may not be interested with the lesson taught by their teacher. An excellent teacher is not just an expert in his or her field, but he or she must be aware of the current issues and prepare himself or herself to teach “something” else. Some things can prove to be more valuable than knowledge itself, which are morals and character. I want to inspire the children who will represent the future of our great nation.

In life, I tried to make many spectacular teachers that have taught me to be my role models.

From the characteristic listed, I intend to grab them to become an excellent teacher.

HOW DO I ACHIEVE IT?

During my undergraduate program, I took a Computer Science course. This will help me to dual master myself, in Information Technology and in teaching. Most of the minor classes that I enrolled were communication and psychology, which would help me in my career as a teacher. Other than that, I also taught in a private tuition centres as my part-time job. During that time, I spent considerable amount of time observing classrooms. With strong education background and wide range of experience which I gained in the classroom, I realize that teaching will be the most suitable career for me. Meanwhile, I work as a personal Information Technology consultant for Smart Academic Management for about two years. This company was doing motivation work for universitie and college students. During this period of time, I am polishing my programming skills. Sometimes, I was given the opportunity to enrol in motivation programmes together with students. This exposes me to different range of human behaviours and life backgrounds especially those involving youngsters. Other than that, I do read a lot of articles regarding teaching methodology, student behaviour, and psychology. There are around 19 encyclopaedias in my book rack regarding software development and psychology. I often make my readings at night after performing my night prayers. I will make my own mind map to make me understand more and to get clear picture about the contents of books that I read. I do virtually contact my foreign friends via internet. This will help me keep in touch with their education line in Australia and Russia. Now, I need to start planning where to open my own private learning centre and how to enhance my marketing strategies.

WHAT MIGHT STOP ME?

I believe that, the time I set my goal there will be the obstacles to stop me achieving it. The most common barrier to reaching my potential is my mind-set, that is, what and how I think about myself and what I wish to achieve. I limit myself by the negative thoughts that I think and I may say. If I think and believe that I cannot accomplish something, then that will come true and I will fail. However, when I think that I can accomplish a task, or overcome a situation and I put in the effort, my future will turn bright. I will only succeed when I start to take control and action to change my destiny towards the goal rather than leave it to fate. Some people said that they have done some work and failed in their first trial. Thus they have not continued working on it anymore. This is just an irrelevant excuse. The solution for this is to reset our mind-set to believe in ourselves and achieve our goal in any way possible. Having failed in the past, does not mean that I will fail again and again for the rest of my life. I should think of things that happened in past in terms of what I can learn from them; seeing all the pass experience as feedback rather than as failure. I should think in this way “Yesterday mining is for today’s goal.” The failure in my past will make me more matured. The past will be beneficial as I can learn from my mistakes. The only thing I can do about my past is to learn from it because the past is over and I cannot change them. Thinking negatively can really stop me from reaching my potential. Negative influences are always around us. Mass media such as radio and idiot box may pass some inappropriate message that can predispose our mind-set. Sometimes I do get negative feedback from family members and friends who are trapped in a negative mind-set. They believe that they are helping me by “being realistic” but it is not helping at all. The best solution is that I should make myself surrounded by positive minded people, people who work hard to achieve their goals. Having positive support is vital. On the other hand, another obstacle that stops me from reaching my potential from being successful is inadequate of plan. Too many people including myself walk through their life simply by taking what is handed to them. The decision made by others will be the decision for themselves. I seldom make my duty plan for the weeks or months ahead. It is so essential that I take some time to start setting up my goals. During the process I can find out how to accomplish those aims, and make suitable timeline for me to have it done. This vital process is often neglected. To set goals starts with listing out what am I going to accomplish. They are those people who set their goal just to “float” along without any attention to better their situation. There is also people who have goals but they are unfamiliar with the correct way and proper plan to make their goal come true. I think I can be categorised under this type of person.